May 20, 2022

Deputy Matt & Others Who Serve

The individual voices and opinions of some first responders

Some Straight Talk About Milo (pun intended)


Even if you had never heard of Milo Yiannopoulos before last week, you have likely heard his name in recent days.  In fact, today at work I asked my partner, a man who has zero social media exposure (not a single account) and whose cell phone is still of the flip variety, if he knew who Milo was and his response was “yeah, he is that flamboyant gay guy who said something about pedophilia.”  Funny how quickly things spread when the mainstream media sharks smell blood.

Now, before I get into this too far, before I get accused of excusing or normalizing pedophilia, I want to clarify something.  I HATE pedophiles, as in hate with a passion, as in hate is not nearly a strong enough word kind of hate.  I am very close with person who was a victim of a pedophile.  I know what that experience did to them.  For the first eight years of my patrol career, my goal was to be a child abuse detective.  I took every single related class I could get, and as a result, I was certified as a child forensic interviewer.  I took every child molest report that came out.  I did follow up on most of my cases with the detectives in the bureau, sometimes even on my own time.

In fact I have written here on this very blog about my disgust with pedophiles, and specifically about the left’s penchant for normalizing such abhorrent behavior.  Child molesters (pedophiles) are monsters! They prey on the most innocent, most vulnerable group of victims that exists.  Child molestation should be a capital crime, but only if we were allowed to torture the suspect to death like a group of max security prison general population inmates would if no guards were around.    So please, believe me when I say I have absolutely zero tolerance for pedophiles.

Now that you hopefully understand my deep disdain for pedophiles, let me say that in my opinion, anyone who says that Milo was “excusing pedophilia” or “normalizing” it, or anything similar to that, is buying exactly what the liberals who dug up that video want you to buy.

First, if you have not watched the unedited clip of the video, or read the transcript, please do so.  It can be found here in an article written by Ben Shapiro.  In fact, you should keep that link open as I am going to refer to a couple of the quotations that have been highlighted by Ben as his points of interest, or points of contention.

So, the sexual encounter that Milo seems to have primarily been discussing was one in which he was 13 years old and he was molested (even though he did not consider it to have been) by an adult male, who in Milo’s own words he found attractive, who also apparently was a priest (whole different subject).  Ignoring the fact that it was a homosexual relationship, can any guy out there honestly tell me that as a 13 year old, there was not some adult woman (or man if that is your thing) that you did not find very attractive and that you had some sort of sexual attraction toward?  Seriously, think back.  Try and remember the things that you thought about as a high school freshman.  Who was that teacher, or actress that all the guys talked about when you were shooting the crap at lunch?   I can vividly recall the hot, brunette, mid 20’s, unmarried English teacher.  I still remember her name, but I won’t say it here.  I won’t even mention the thoughts I had about Farah Fawcett when I was a pre-teen.

Farrah_Fawcett_iconic_pinup_1976Don’t pretend that you don’t know what I am talking about.   Hell, Van Halen had a song I’m sure we have all heard a time or two; Hot For Teacher.    You see, sexual attraction for a teenage boy is a natural, hormonal, biological thing, and if any of us somehow managed to live out those desires we felt, I seriously doubt any of us would feel like a victim (even though we technically would be).  And that right there is where Milo was coming from when he was discussing his encounter.

Another one of the comments Milo made that is freaking people is out is when he thanked his molester for teaching him how to perform oral sex well.  Since I’ve already discussed why Milo did not really consider his molester a molester (reread my previous two paragraphs if you are still unclear on that), him thanking one of the people who was his first, and importantly in this context, willing sexual encounter for teaching him how to do something is not exactly that earth shattering.  Once again, let us all stop for a minute and think back to our first sexual encounter, especially if it was with a more experienced partner.  Did they teach you anything that you could be grateful for?  Were you a minor at the time?  Were you a willing participant in the endeavor?  If you were to make some sort of off-color remark during the midst of a light hearted conversation about learning something from that encounter, how would it be different from what Milo said?

I can hear you now, “but Milo said he thinks certain people are capable of giving consent at a younger age!”

Yes, he did say that, right AFTER he said that he thinks the legal age for giving consent is “probably about right.”  He was not making an argument for lowering the age of consent, he was merely pointing out that some people are more mature than others are younger ages.  I think we would all agree that that statement is true, right?  Are not some 11 year olds not mature enough to defend themselves and their home with a gun?  Every time something like that happens, we pro-gun conservatives are quick be supportive of the excellent, mature actions of the youngster, but that also does not mean that we want to run around and stick a loaded gun in the hands of every 11 year old.  It simply means that we are acknowledging that the 11 year old in question was able to handle those complex decisions in a stressful environment, a feat that many grown adults cannot do.  In that same respect, trying to twist Milo’s comment that some people younger than the legal consent age are capable of making mature decisions into something it was not takes a yoga-like flexibility my mind is incapable of.

Ben highlighted this comment because apparently he has an issue with it; “You’re misunderstanding what pedophilia means. Pedophilia is not a sexual attraction to someone 13 years old who is sexually mature.”

But here’s the thing, Milo is exactly correct.  Per the Merriam Webster dictionary:

noun  pe·do·phil·ia \ˌpe-də-ˈfi-lē-ə, ˌpē-\
:  sexual perversion in which children are the preferred sexual object; specifically :  a psychological disorder in which an adult has sexual fantasies about or engages in sexual acts with a prepubescent child   (emphasis added)

I’ve heard many point to the fact that Milo was referring to a relationship between a “boy” and an older man who provides for the boy.  People are suggesting that Milo was again suggesting that pedophilia was okay, but in doing so, they are ignoring something that I was not aware of until this whole Milo incident.  The word “boy,” or in the slang spelling of “boi,” has its own special meaning in the LGBT community.

“A ‘boi’ is (generally) the younger person who prefers older partners, and is the ‘boi’ in a ‘daddy and boi’ dating, relationship, or sexual situation, where ‘boy’ and ‘boi’, respectively, are used to differentiate between someone who is underage, and someone who just identifies as the younger who wants or needs someone older. In this context, ‘boi’ can be masculine or effeminate, or anywhere along that spectrum, and some males identify as a ‘boi’ well beyond their 20s, and especially so long as they are involved with older men. Often, though not always, a ‘boi’ prefers a submissive role.”

Getting beyond what was said in the video, I’ve seen many conservatives eager to throw Milo under the bus because “he is not a conservative.”  No, he is most definitely not a traditional conservative.  Hell, he is a very in-your-face flamboyant gay guy, from England no less.  He is absolutely not a traditional conservative, and that is in fact the beautiful thing about him.  He reaches audiences that olderish straight conservative white guys like me can never reach, and I am about 100x more adept at interacting on social media than the conservative establishment is.  While he may not be a traditional conservative, he definitely preaches many conservative values.

Another bogus attack on him is that he has made “anti-Semitic comments.”  In the anti-Milo hit piece published by the traditional conservatives over at the National Review, they had the following to say on that topic:

“Yiannopoulos — who has himself hurled anti-Semitic slurs (he recently described a Jewish BuzzFeed reporter as ‘a typical example of a sort of thick-as-pig s**t media Jew’)”

Calling that comment, made by someone of Jewish ancestry, anti-Semitic is the logical equivalent of calling a black guy calling another black guy the N-word a white supremacist, or suggesting that because I refer to myself as “some dumb street cop” that I am anti-law enforcement.  To those unfamiliar with the concept, there is a thing referred to as “in-grouping” and it is not a new concept.

Lastly, some folks point to the flippancy with which Milo discussed his victimization.  Any cop, or firefighter, or EMT, or ER nurse can tell you, victims of crimes, especially those of a violent or sexual nature, all react differently to them.  Some blame themselves, some get angry, some sad, some depressed, some even get suicidal, and some use inappropriate humor to deal with the stress.  In fact, if you are or know any first responders, or folks who have served in combat, you damn well know we are masters at cracking socially unacceptable jokes at the absolute most inappropriate times, such as standing at the scene of a grisly homicide.  Hell, I’ve been known to make self-deprecating, inappropriate jokes about stupid or silly things I’ve done on my Facebook page.    It is a coping mechanism, a well known one at that.

Here’s the thing folks, those of you upset with Milo need to take a few steps back, take a deep breath or two and look at this from a logical perspective.  Where is this information (the edited video) coming from, and who benefits from Milo being shamed into the shadows?  It looks an awful lot to me like we are eating one of our own, who is being spoonfed to us by the enemy.  Throwing Milo aside because we he does not fit the Jell-O mold of what one thinks a conservative is, is the same thing the Republican establishment did to the Tea Party early on, and that they often do to the Libertarians.  It is stupid, and self-defeating.

LAST MINUTE ADDITION: In writing this, I totally forgot to mention the “actions speak louder than words” argument.  Milo’s comments in that video are being touted as him speaking positively about pedophilia.  However, at least according to Milo (and it should be easy enough to confirm his statements) he has outed at least three different pedophiles.  That doesn’t seem very accepting to me.  On the other hand, it is the political left who continually tries to normalize pedophilia and even protects certain famous, liberal Hollywood type pedophiles.